Saturday, June 28, 2008

Wanted


So I decided to venture out and catch Wanted... on opening night. Now this may not seem like a big deal, but you are wrong and stupid, it is a huge deal. You see, the world is full of assholes, and Friday nights, as it seems, all of these assholes meander to their local movie theaters. And what do they do when they get there? They take it upon themselves to test my patience. I came to watch a movie, not to listen to you talk to your friends and to be blinded by your constant text messaging. I also hate waiting in lines. Especially when people come out of the theater talking about the ending of the movie you are about to see. Thanks for the spoiler, cock.

On to the review.

Inspired by the red band trailer riddled with bloody bullets bursting through the brains of bad guys (how about that tone painting?), I paid $8 and saw Wanted.

The theater was packed, the trailers were lame, and some couple thought it would be cool to bring their babies to an R rated movie at 10:30PM...BUT I guess you want to read about the movie.

Wanted is an adaption of a comic book of the same name by Mark Millar, but I never read the comic so all you nerds wondering how closely it follows the comic book, I'm going to assume it doesn't.

Leading man James McAvoy is Scottish, but he plays an American in Wanted. Not only does the idea of a non-American faking an "American accent" weird me out, it also bothers me that even the roles in Hollywood are being outsourced to foreigners. He is convincing as a scared guy that gets confidence with his new found super powers though, which is one thing Toby Mcgwire can't do.

Like every movie made in America in the last 6 years, Morgan Freeman is also in the movie. I guess he is a good actor, but as the leader of a Fraternity of Assasins he isn't very intimdating. Maybe it's those freckles, he's just so cute!

Angelina Jolie plays Fox... I get it, you're a tough girl.

The action sequences were pretty awesome. Nothing new. The CGI was decent, and I think only once I got bothered by how fake it looked.

In typical Action Movie form, this movie suffers from "shaky cam"... you know, when you can't really tell what is going on because the camera won't stop moving. It gets really bad in a few places, especially in the beginning, but I was able to overlook it. It's not like it was as bad as Resident Evil.

There is a twist ending which you might be able to pick up on a little before it comes. Right before it happens you'll say "Oh yeah" and then try your best to whisper the end to your date before they do it to you. This is kind of a let down because of how obvious it becomes.

Wanted was decent. If you like blood and car crashes on a huge screen with the opportunity to gasp with delight with a hundred other people I reccommend seeing this one in theaters. It may not be the best movie of the year, but it beats renting Gone In Sixty Seconds.

3.5/5 stars or something (I'll come up with a grading system later)

-Dude, That Movie Sucked